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Tehran Is Facing a Drought—Government Talks About Abandoning the City, Millions Live There. Where Are All the People Going?

· 4 min read

Picture this: a bustling metropolis that’s been home to 9‑10 million people for centuries, now looking like a dried‑up pancake. The government’s been debating whether to abandon the city altogether, and the rest of the world is watching with a mix of pity, envy, and the occasional “what‑if‑we‑did‑the‑same” meme.

The Big Picture​

It’s not a small problem. Think Bronze Age collapse, think “water wars” that are practically the new “global warming.” The city’s water supply is at 0.1 % of what it used to be, and the only thing left is the faint smell of old plumbing and a hopeful new generation of “I‑will‑build‑my‑own‑reservoir‑in‑my‑backyard” entrepreneurs.

The government’s official response? “We’re considering leaving. It’s not a decision we’re taking lightly, but the only other option is to let the city become a giant indoor aquarium.” Meanwhile, people are packing up their things, deciding whether they want to stay, move to the countryside, or join the next wave of climate refugees heading to the “new water frontier.”

What’s Going On?​

  • Water shortages are so severe that people are using rainwater from their roofs for cooking.
  • The city’s infrastructure is crumbling faster than a paper cup in a rainstorm.
  • International media is treating it like a “real‑time survival reality show.”
  • Neighboring countries are already looking at Tehran’s plight as a “water war” case study for their own future.

You might wonder: “Why isn’t the government just dumping all the water on the streets?” The answer? Because the water is already gone, and the city’s remaining supply is more like a “soup‑stock” than a “water‑stock.”

A World Watching​

The comments section (spoiler: it’s full of memes, serious worries, and a dash of sarcasm) shows how the world reacts to crises:

  • Someone compared the situation to the Bronze Age collapse, implying that the current crisis might be the start of a new “Age of Drought.”
  • Another warned that Water Wars are on the horizon, suggesting that the next 15–20 years might be “eventful” enough to make reality TV producers nervous.
  • A comment about the Syrian civil war turned out to be a reminder that war and water are inseparable, and that the refugees fleeing Syria are essentially climate refugees in disguise.
  • A Colombian lamented that their own country might be “invaded” in the future for its water resources, proving that water anxiety is truly global.
  • And a laugh‑out‑loud comment from a Cascadian speaker joked that they have “water for days” while the Cascadia subduction zone has a 37 % chance of a 7.1+ megathrust earthquake in the next 50 years—just to keep the conversation balanced.

TL;DR​

Tehran is on the brink of a water apocalypse, and the government is contemplating turning the city into a giant desert aquarium. The world watches, memes are made, and the inevitable Water Wars loom on the horizon. Meanwhile, the residents are probably debating whether to pack their bags, build backyard reservoirs, or become the next wave of climate refugees.

This is like Bronze Age collapse shit. It’s wild to see in the modern era.

The Water Wars are coming mate. Best strap in, the next 15-20 years will almost certainly be eventful.

The Syrian civil war is the first water war. We’re already in it. The Syrian refugees are climate refugees.

As a Colombian, I'm afraid my country will be invaded in some decades for its water.

laughs in Cascadian We’ve got water for days!
Just ignore the 37% chance of a 7.1+ megathrust earthquake in the next 50 years in the Cascadia Subduction Zone…